Inspecting for drugs.

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He
tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown
drugs." The rancher says, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there,"
as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the authority
of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket,
he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this
badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any
land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do
you understand? "

The rancher nods politely, apologies, and goes about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA
officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis
bull......

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems
likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is
clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence
and yells at the top of his lungs.....

" Your badge. Show him your BADGE !"

Pirate Personality Test

You are The Cap'n!



Some men and women are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any scalawag who stands between them and unlimited power. You never met a man - or woman - you couldn't eviscerate. You are the definitive Man of Action, the CEO of the Seven Seas, Lee Iacocca in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. You're mission-oriented, and if anyone gets in the way, that's his problem, now isn't? Your buckle was swashed long ago and you have never been so sure of anything as your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off his head if he shows any sign of taking you on or backing down. If one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.




What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/ppi.htm

More jobs done on the folding camper.

So that's how the sofa goes together!

New inner "bedroom" in daytime mode and

night time mode. Amazing what you can make from sheets & old duvet covers :-)

Now with working door!

Progress. Put the new zip in yesterday - by hand. Sore finger & thumb.

Yes I know, but it was never gong to be straight fitting a new zip inside the old one. It is however a 100% improvement on not being able to shut the door at all (something the previous owner somehow managed to miss off the description on eBay).

Our new project.

 Lots of jobs to do before it's ready for a trip to Scotland in June.

Like replacing the zip on the door.

New gas locker already made.

Needs curtains!

I'm not sure about that gas fire.

Kitchen needs water and gas hoses fitting.

Hopefully the sun will shine and we'll get the jobs done in time :-)

Vodafone - useless tossers

Has anyone ever managed to get anything to work on Vodafone's webshite? Four times I've tried to top up my phone with this result:



If I try via the phone it tells me my card has expired, which the web site confirms isn't till 02/2012. Obviously these muppets are working in a different timezone to the rest of the planet :-( Why do we put up with this crap service in this country? Yes, ok, don't tell me, it was a rhetorical question, they're all equally crap.

Bracknell Telephone Exchange

Bracknell Telephone Exchange
Originally uploaded by snaprails

Bracknell Telephone Exchange, Market Street, photographed 8 April 1965